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image from wikipedia

image from wikipedia

I’ve been dreading meeting with my attorney to discuss the Marital Settlement Agreement.  Our emails back and forth about the damn thing have been terse.  Hers have been off-putting.  I was locked and loaded for yesterday’s appointment.

Turned out to be unnecessary.

She made the changes and tweaks I’d requested, plus clarified some of the language to reflect my concerns.  The way the child sharing was drafted left the door open for shared physical custody, which is against #3’s expressed desire.  So she fixed that.  Don’t get me wrong, though, if #3 wants to spend time with her father, I will not stand in the way.  They get to have whatever relationship they create.  But #3 gets to draw her own boundaries, too.  And I’m not going to cram a relationship down her throat, especially at the expense of my relationship with her.

So that was good.

We discussed the house, its sale and how to pay the bills on it.  There’s an account I can use, that I need to use, and the lawyer gave me the green light.  She also revised the agreement as to who pays the current property taxes (answer: both of us).  No explanation of why the agreement originally had me solely responsible for the taxes on our jointly-owned, empty house.

Whatever.  It’s fixed now.

The remaining problem area was the 2013 tax returns.  I’m just going to let that go.  I’ve got to get #1’s FAFSA application done this week and I don’t have time to finesse Voldemort or the IRS.  So we’ll file separately and I’ll lose my half of the mortgage interest and other property-related deductions because I have no income outside of the family support Voldemort provided.  Upside:  I won’t have to file another tax return with a man who’s a proven liar and risk the wrath of the federal government coming down on me.

We’re hoping to get the settlement done in the same timeframe as getting the house sold.  There are a few debts to be paid from the sale proceeds, so wrapping everything up simultaneously would make things go more smoothly.

Mr. Mens’ Rights attorney hasn’t contacted my lawyer about the MSA, which probably indicates that Voldemort hasn’t asked his attorney about it.  It’s been over two months since the settlement meeting and I’ve contacted my lawyer at least twice.  Maybe I’m more anxious to get the divorce moving along than he is at this point.  Who knows?

Now I wait to see the second draft, then it gets sent over to Mr. Mens’ Rights attorney.  And the ball will be in their court.  I swear, the legal process of divorce has more back and forth, give and take than my marriage ever did.